Thirteen Things About Xmas in Florida:
1. There is no snow.
2. People compensate for that fact by putting fake snow around.
3. Fake snow at the base of palm trees looks stupid.
4. Santas dressed in surfer gear look like dirty old men.
5. The balmy weather allows for elaborate Christmas light displays. If a decoration can be
lit up and stuck on a lawn , it will be.
6. Inflatable snowmen and animated Santas are popular targets for thieves.
7. Their electrical cords are popular targets for possums and raccoons. "ZAP"
8. Baby Jesus has to be padlocked to his manger .
9. Xmas lights aren't taken down in January. Busy homeowners leave them up all year.
10. When a hurricane is coming those same homeowners forget about stocking up on
groceries and plywood. Instead, they run around removing their Xmas lights.
11. Being forced to listen to musical decorations 24 hours a day results in violence.
12. People actually give help to the less fortunate.
13. Peace, at least locally, seems possible.